Maria is 18 months old now. She has been very dedicated to breastfeeding since the minute she was born, still with her cord on. I had been meaning to stop earlier in the summer, once she had hit 15 months as that would have been the same as her brother but it just didn't happen. We both enjoyed it too much! It was such as special moment of closeness, specially on the days when I wouldn't see her all day due to work, at least we had that special time in the morning and the evening.
But I don't see myself breastfeeding a 4 year old... and there is this tale in my family of how my grandfather had to be sent to stay with relatives as a 4 year old to stop him breastfeeding. So last week I went on a work trip to Vienna, stayed there for three nights and didn't breastfeed her on return.
Eventhough it was my decision, and I know it makes sense for me, and other than the first couple of days since I got back she hasn't asked for it, I still feel really sad about it. I suppose it marks the end to my baby nurturing phase, I have spent the last four years and a half either breastfeeding or pregnant. And I don't think I will have other children, so this will be it.
Of course this is not the end of parenting and Daniel and Maria are developing into wonderful little people and they will still need me for a long while...
It doesn't help that it is quite painful at the moment, not the nicest reminder!
Writing from my beloved Catalonia at the moment... love the family, love the food, love the weather, love the friends...
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